forget all of that shit i just said about how i can’t go to the one direction concert. i am physically able to buy a ticket and attend now that i’ve found available tickets and gotten the okay from my mom. the problem? I DON’T HAVE ANY REAL FRIENDS WHO ARE WILLING TO GO WITH ME. that’s it. i’m officially sick of life.
so i thought i got 2 1D tickets from my friend’s friend (that i’ve met multiple times before) as of yesterday. i told her i could pay her within the next week and everything and she gave the tickets to our mutual friend to give to me who i saw today. the girl i was supposed to get the tickets from bailed out because of her other friends, so i didn’t think i had to wait for the tickets to go on sale to the general public this morning. so, now i don’t have tickets.
why me. like seriously. why couldn’t this one thing just work out. as much as i promised myself that i’d never fangirl again (well at least to the extent of my twilight phase) i honestly feel sick & could cry right now. i cannot even handle this. they aren’t going to come back to canada in a long time, and i thought it had all worked out. why can’t life be fair. why can’t everything be free so that i could get the tickets that i want. (& yes i know that should be the least of my worries in terms of issues in the world. but this is just one insignificant thing that could have easily worked that just didn’t.)
i wish i didn’t like one direction. there are too many things to like about them though :( 5 guys from the uk with incredible voices, looks, who are really nice, and who are absolutely hilarious? what is there not to like? gosh life would be easier and my view of guys wouldn’t be so messed up if it weren’t for my discovery of them. other guys will never ever live up to harry (or any of them). i’m just another fangirl among the thousands and thousands of others to them. one that will never get to meet them, and apparently most likely never even attend one of their concerts. as i said, my life would be so much easier if i didn’t like one direction.
I LOST FOUR POUNDS :D
BMI now = 32.4, aka one step closer :)
(yes i know it isn’t a big difference, but i’ve never actually documented losing any weight before.)
I kind of went off it all again. & things are uhm. I don’t even know anymore.
I’ve gotten accepted to three universities so far, so I’m not as worried about things for next year as much as I was.
I miss my friend that moved away. SO MUCH. & It sucks because she’s only coming back to visit a few times & for prom and grad and just the important stuff. She’s the only one I spoke to last semester at lunch. It’s grade 12, & I don’t even feel like I have friends anymore. At lunch, I sit with people I have never sat with before, other than one of my other closer friends, and I hadn’t realized how other than my “group,” who I do not ever have classes with, I have practically no one. I feel like social interaction is just becoming difficult, and this just means that I’m going to be screwed next year, and truly be alone. Every time I turn around I say I’m not going to be self-conscious and just live life the way I want to without caring. But apparently I am incapable of that.
I started to look at prom dresses a few nights ago, and all I know now is that I need to look amazing to fit into the ones I’m considering. So hello prom diet & work out, goodbye food I actually like. The next few months are going to be interesting.
Jess
So I was doing my C&C poster on bulimia. I planned on making a collage & as I was looking for pictures of food in all of the magazines in my room, I found all of my old seventeen magazines. As I was looking, I found in all of them various workouts and health tips. So. I ripped them all out, and I have decided that I am going to attempt to try all (or most) of them over time.
I just did the “flat abs in 4 moves” Pilates workout. Goodness I am officially in pain now. [whatevs. no pain no gain, right?]
For dinner, I ate chicken & asparagus [all without any kind of sauce- that’s a first :)]
For a snack before dinner, I ate a grapefruit [which I absolutely love & I am now planning on it becoming my new & most frequently eaten snack- yay!] & after dinner I was still hungry, so I had a handful of pretzels with a teaspoon of peanut butter.
In the morning, I’m planning on having a strawberry/banana smoothie (made with frozen strawberries & bananas with milk) & for lunch I’m planning on having lemon water, and a salad with pieces of chicken breast, along with another handful of pretzels with another teaspoon of peanut butter. I may have some clementines at lunch or after school (still pondering that. Just bought more. YUM.).
First update this year. I’m kind of excited to see if any of this works.
Anywho. I’m going to do another leg & arm workout. & my homework. *sigh*
It’s only the first day back & I am already sick of school. I’m guessing this isn’t a good sign for the next month or so until second semester. (omgsh and march break countdown has officially started.) Wow. Okay so;
TO DO:
- data unit one review
- finish challenge and change poster
- work on individuals and families thing
- make data presentation (and practice)
- work on story assignment for data
goodness I really hope I actually get this crap done tonight.
